interesting roommates

For the first time in three years..i.e since i moved into this apartment, i feel like an outsider..in my own apartment!!!!!I got this apartment since i started my studies here in helsinki and have never moved, i have grown so attached to it such that i dont picture myself moving out any time soon, though am graduating so soon i'll have to get out whether i like it or not. Living in a HOAS apartment, roomates come and go, i dont know why finns dont like staying in one place for long, none of my roommates have ever lasted more than six months here and no, its not me who has a problem am actually among the most peaceful roomates one could ever get. As i was saying, living in a HOAS apartment, you never know who u'll get for a roommate once someone moves out and you have to be ready to live with weirdos. Luckily i have never had any troublesome roommates like other pple(there are always visagas of all kinds kwanza living with finns).
Recently, i got two new roommates, one moved in towards the end of last year when i was away in london and the other one came in at the beginning of this year. I always suspected the first one to be gay but i couldn't rely on speculation and coincidentally, the newer one is also gay or should i say a lesbian?Whatever. Not like i have anything against gay or lesbians but i just find it weird and kinda unnatural. Jana my judgement was proved right...yep, saw it with my eyes. Well, what can i say?Its a changing world but anyone who was born and brought up in kenya will agree with me that its a bit unbelievable, uncomfortable too given that am straight. Turns out that the two gals are 'men' so in a way, am living with two men in my house. They walk, talk,dress and act like men and their 'girlfriends' come to visit and spend nights. Now am even feeling a bit uneasy walking to the bathroom with nothing but my towel rapped around my body when they are there coz am imagining that just like a normal man would do they are probably eyeing my legz. ha ha!!!!Its not like i mind then and we do get along just fine. Just incase someone is wondering HOAS means Helsingin seudun opiskelija asuntosäätio or Helsinki region student housing foundation.

Sometime during summer 2004 i was in a party with my best friend and i got so drunk and was telling her that 'am the only sober one in this house' it was soooo funny to her and since then she has never forgotten we always enjoy each other when we go out for drinks ama in a party 'seems like you are the only sober one in this house/club'. So today i told her that i can comfortably say 'am the only straight one in this house'!!!!She laughed her lungs out.

Who stole the mandazi's?????

Its true, kenyans will always be kenyans. Yesterday the same friend who had her birthday on thursday held a small belated birthday party. We had lots of fun pple drinking, cracking jokes, dissing each other. My friend had decided to make nyamchom,ugali and kachumbali. She had also made mandazi's just incase anyone was interested. The nyama was so so much pple kulad until they could eat no more..and when everyone was leaving, she said that she doesnt want any food to remain in her house so she started gawanyaing nyama for everyone to take home with them. Then she remembered the mandazi's!She looked for them everywhere but they had done the disappearing act!!!!At first it seemed like a joke but after looking everywhere we could think of, we dint find them anywhere a full paperbag of them. Hmm...i laughed about it but thinking about it today, i think its disgusting. Yaani someone decided to beba a whole paperbag of mandazi with them despite the great hospitality and full stomachs and take away??Uskomatonta!(finnish for unbelievable), kweli, ogopa wakenya, ha!

Of surprises..

I love surprises..they are just..exciting!!!!This year, i really really wanted to plan a surprise birthday for my best friend but given the way am broke, i couldnt do that. But because i wanted something different and special for her, i decided to have someone bake a special cake for her..it was the cheapest way out for me. Luckily i got someone who would do it for me for free all i had to do was buy them the ingredients. I couldnt belive how lucky i was coz i knew going to the bakery would cost me even more than i'd have spent on a small surprise party. It was nothing so ceremonial but my siz and i called my friend when we right outside her house to open the door for us...and when she opened the door we gave her the cake while singing happy birthday..just the two of us. It was a special moment my friend almost cried..i loved the look on her face when she opened the box and saw what was inside!!I myself had not seen that cake before so it was a surprise for me too: it was just lovely, really huge and with her name and age on the sides and her names' initials on top, covering the whole cake..cant even explain. Anyway, it was beautiful and we had a lovely evening laughing and talking and my friend was happy and more than grateful.

If only..

I really hate to drown in self pity but sometimes i dont have a choice but to do that, coz sometimes it seems like the only and best way to make myself feel better. At the beginning of this year, i promised myself that i will not let anyone at all ever take my happiness away from me. Last year was a bad year for me, i let what people think and say about me get the better of me, i let myself get used by people and it ended up being one of the worst years of my life.
One month into 2006 am still trying very hard to live upto what i promised my inner self but of late i feel like am drifting and one of my worst fears is that last year will repeat itself. That means that i have to be really strong and keep it the way i wanted it in the first place otherwise am going to feel dissapointed with myself when this year comes to an end. My biggest problem is that when i get into something, i give it my all, be it a relationship, a friendship even jobs but the saddest thing is that i end up getting dissapointed and hurt. I have been betrayed by friends, by men, lost jobs...yeah its part of growing up but sometimes life feels so unfair like it is right now. arrrgh, what am i trying to say?I know exactly what am trying to say but i cant put it down here the way i want to because i never know who might be reading this...all the same, the main idea in logging in and starting to write this post is because i feel dissapointed by someone i love so so so much and no matter how hard i try to tell them how i feel, they just never seem to understand what i mean...or is it me using the wrong words?I dont know. Sometimes i really hate myself for being so lighthearted and loving so strongly(coz not many pple in the world are willing to love you unselfishly). One of my biggest wishes today are to get someone to love me the way i want, to love me back the way i love them(by this i guess i mean-get a man who will make me truly happy and consider my feelings the way i consider his)..forget what pple say that you should love and expect nothing in return..sometimes it doesnt work that way!Thats a fact.